Back in the Dark Ages when all Navy Ships were powered by mighty steam (or the 80s, take your pick) I was given a good sized job on the USS Paul, FF-1080. It was to install a new run from the towed array room all the way to Sonar in the 0-2. There was already one in place but this one had to be run differently: a specific distance from any other existing line carrying electrical current. It was a pretty complex job and had me working directly with a NAVSEA SUPSHIP to make on the spot changes to the drawing as needed. I first had to modify a ton of hangar to wire ways to the two lines would be the correct minimum distance from the existing (I had two guys who did that for me) and then all the bulkhead penetrations, aka, stuffing tubes. We decided (I was told) to drill all the holes with hole saws so we didn’t have to worry about a lot of hot sparks from burning in tight quarters. We still had to weld them but it was a lot less hot work
I was given a helper to do the grunt work of drilling and to help me carry our gear from one place to the next. I was blessed with a strapping young man who just so happened to be the stepson of one of our lead men. I didn’t know this kid so he got the benefit of doubt but something about him caused my BullShit detector to start pinging. He seemed to be a nice kid but something about him…
We did fine for the first week together. He worked hard, followed instruction and I had no complaints. Then came the day…we were working in the XOs stateroom and I had laid out the two locations for drilling the holes for the stuffing tubes. I left the ship, having made sure he understood what he had to do. I was back 30 minutes late and when I entered the XOs stateroom I liked to had a heart attack: he was on the XOs phone talking to his girlfriend! Now in those days there were no cell phones and the only phone we were allowed to use and only in an emergency was the quarterdeck phone. I told my helper to hang up ASAP and he did. He explained that he and his true love were having relationship issues. I explained that I really didn’t give a damn, he was to never, ever use a shipboard phone again, that there were two pay phones on the pier. And thinking that we had resolved the training issues, I took off to the next location to be prepared for the next days work.
I get back to the XOs stateroom thinking that the holes should be drilled and cleanup underway. Instead, I open the door and not only is this dumb SOB on the phone again, he’s LAYING ON THE XOs RACK!!!!. I snatched the phone away with one hand and him out of the rack with the other hand and proceeded to eat his ass out. I will not repeat all that I said to him but after 5 minutes of ass chewing I told him to get off the ship and don’t EVER come back again. To make sure he did, I followed him. As I stepped into the passage way, I was surprised to see a grizzled Senior Chief Bos’n Mate standing there with a big grin on his face. I apologized to him for the profanity and volume but he shook his head and asked how long was I a Chief before I got out of the Navy. I confessed that I was a career civilian and had never served in the Navy. He said I would have made a fine Chief and I can’t begin to tell how pleased that made me. Years later, a retired Master Chief friend and I got together down in Crystal River and he gave me a Fouled Anchor from his fist combination cap, as he believed also that I would have made a fine Chief Petty Officer. I was humbled beyond belief.
I am, and shall always be, a simple Yardbird…but thanks Tom!
I would concur with the Chief's assessment.